the worst date I’ve ever been on

 

so I’m waiting tables this was probably 2016, and I’m working a really busy lunch rush and a man sits in another server section and looks like it’s like a business lunch, they’re all wearing suits it’s like five men.

I’m passing by so he waves me down and I don’t think anything of it because that’s common when you wait tables where another person’s section will flag you down because they just need help from somebody so I approach the table and I say what can I help you with and he says “I think you’re fucking gorgeous and I want to take you out” so he handed me his business card we’ll call him Chuck so I gave him a call and we made plans for the weekend says Camden Town Escorts from https://charlotteaction.org/camden-town-escorts.

so he shows up to take me out and he’s driving a really nice sports car and I thought this will be fun so we’re on the five styles and we’re driving and I asked where are we going and he says “I’m taking you to the Zoo today isn’t that awesome has any guy ever done that for you before I am the best” he was patting himself on the back as if he had planned some like overnight trip o Paris or something so we’re at the zoo and we’re looking at the animals we’re walking around and he keeps trying to put his hand around my waist and his arms around my neck and at one point we’re checking out the Tigers and he tries to kiss me on the sly on my neck being all creepy and weird and it was just way too much way too soon it was like he wanted to go from strangers to boyfriend and girlfriend instantly.

and apparently he got sick of being there because all of a sudden he got super impatient and rushed me out of the zoo like I would stand there trying to take in the beautiful peacocks and he’s going alright come on let’s go what’s with you and the birds you just want to hang out and look at birds it was like he was criticizing me enjoying the zoo that he took me to and then when we leave the zoo he gets a cell phone call from some old friend who’s in town just for the night with his girlfriend and he’s like hey man let’s get together let’s get dinner and Chuck is like but I’m on a date and then he goes come on it’s night in and I can hear this by the way the guys talking really loud and he turns to me is like you want to get dinner tonight with my old friend his girlfriend they want to meet up at their favorite steakhouse and I had already told him that I was a vegetarian but I was like sure I’ll get a baked potato or something so we’re at the steak house and the four of us finally sit down

after a really long wait and I’m noticing Chuck is being super rude to all of the wait staff for example he gets his salad and asked the server for a side of extra ranch dressing literally two minutes later he’s turning to me what’s our fucking server’s name again where the fuck is my ranch dressing hey

so after our double date is over he’s supposed to be driving me home but then he comes up with some excuse that I can’t remember now that he needs to stop at his apartment and because he didn’t get enough rejection at the zoo when I go up into his place and we’re sitting down he sits right next to me and tries to make a move and I’m like I’m sorry you know what you just want to go from zero to 80 within the day and I’m sorry I’m just not feeling that way and you’re coming on too strong and he looked at me like I had grown another head like he was shocked and I didn’t want to immediately jump in the sack with him and well let’s just say there was no date number two

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